“How did I land here?” I kept asking the Angels. How is it that I was so lucky to be chosen to be here when I had been in one of my darkest moments just 24 hours before?
I reveled in bliss, or what I thought was bliss, later realizing that what I was actually feeling was more like relief.
So, how did I misinterpret the difference between relief and bliss?
Well, the journey to the answer to that question has been an exploration, a sorting through the experiences that closed off my recognizing the door into my soul, the part of me that is infinitely connected to my real home. “Where,” you may ask, “is your home?” My true home is the place where my soul was born and infused with the human “me”, the purest expression of the Creator’s love.
From the time I was a young child, up to this point in my life, my heart, eyes, ears, and emotions had all been blinded by what was going on around me. And, so, I learned to discount my feelings, to make them “wrong”.
Through my exploration, I have learned that relief is the destination where I can pause and hide for a while, where I can feel safe, separated from my panic, and free from the terror my mind sometimes subjects me to.
But when I feel bliss, I recognize the always-open door that serves as my connection between my soul and God.
I know for sure – even as I used to think I was hanging by one finger, dangling off a cliff – that there is no drop, there is no cliff; there is only God.